They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
