well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Randomize