so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
