I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
