whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Randomize
