I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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