i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
