I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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