I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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