dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
