You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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