is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
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