I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
