Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Welp...herpes.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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