just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
