an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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