I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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