What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
