I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
