last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
