cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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