My room smells like vodka and shame
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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