Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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