You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
