I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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