Me too!
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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