dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize