i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
