bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
