I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
So many bounce houses so little time
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
