Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
