Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
