Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
