Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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