i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
