Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
fuck your aforementioned shoe
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Randomize
