I didn't shave. On purpose
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
