she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
