yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
