We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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