he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
