They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
