THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
