using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
