i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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