Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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