wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
