He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
