you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
