He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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