You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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